Dedicated to Nik and E Dub

This seems to have been a really shitty week for a couple of my friends. :-( Both are dealing with a major loss and I really don't know how to help. I don't even know if I can. These two people mean a lot to me and both have had a hand in shaping the person writing this blog. Both have been there for me when I was feeling at my lowest so I want to be there for them. I call, I leave messages on FB and MS, whatever I can to show them that I care.

Two songs popped into my head when thinking about their sitchyations. One could be seen as being from their point of view and the other could be seen as my response. Don't look at me like that! This is how I express myself sometimes. I can't sing and I'm not good at writing lyrics so I let the lyrics of others speak for me (and sometimes for everyone else lol).

To Nik and E, if y'all are reading this, I hope that you find some comfort in these songs and that y'all truly see how I feel about all of this. I also want to say I'm sorry. I know that loss is a messed up thing whether it's your lover or a loved one.

E - Remember what I told you the other day: I know you're sad but take comfort in the fact that he's not feeling any kind of pain anymore.

N - If they ain't gonna treat you the way you want then LET THEM GO!

I love y'all crazy asses (said with a LOT of love) and I miss y'all!


Reina Negra V aka V-Bear aka Bighead


Troubles by Alicia Keys

Dear Lord, can You take it away?
This pain in my heart just follows me by day.
And at night, it stalks me like the shadows on my wall.
Oh my goodness…

Feel like the world is closing on me
Feel like my dreams will never come to me
I keep on slippin’ deeper into myself
And I'm scared, so scared.

If you’re troubled, you’ve just gotta let it go
If you’re worried, baby, you’ve just gotta let it go
All your hustles seem for nothin’, you’ve just gotta take it slow
When you need me baby, all you do is let me know

Why does it feel that my mind is constantly trying to pull me down?
I can’t seem to get away
Continuous mistakes I know I made before
How long will I feel so out of place?

If you’re troubled, you’ve just gotta let it go
If you’re worried, baby, you’ve just gotta let it go
All your hustles seem for nothin’, you’ve just gotta take it slow
When you need me baby, all you do is let me know...



Security by Joss Stone aka my response

A loss that would have thrown a hole through anybody's soul
And you were only human after all
So don't hold back the tears, my dear
Release them so your eyes can clear
I know that you will rise again but you gotta let them fall
I wish that I could snap my fingers
Erase the past but no
You cannot rewind reality
Once the tape's unrolled

If your spirit's broken and you can't bear the pain
I will help you put the pieces back a little more each day
And if your heart is locked and you can't find the key
Lay your head upon my shoulder
I'll set you free
I'll be your security

A moment of despair
That forces you to say that life's unfair
It makes you scared of what tomorrow may bring
But don't go giving into fear
Stop hiding all alone in there
The show keeps going on and on but you'll miss the whole damn thing
I wish I had a crystal ball to see what the future holds
But we don't know how the story ends till it's all been told

On any clock upon the wall the time is always now
So baby kiss the past goodbye
Don't let the future blow your mind
Just sit back and chill
Take things as they come
You can't be afraid
To live for today
I will be with you each step of the way...